I have slowly but surely come to the conclusion that you eventually have to forgive someone for the pain they have inflicted on you because the sad reality is that whatever it is you are holding a grudge over most likely only bothers you or brings unnecessary depression to you, not this anonymous person on the other end of said situation. After an uncountable amount of hours spent weaping in my room, at school, on prom night, or wherever else it may be that my emotions overwhelm me, I have become fed up with my own negativity. 99% of the time I find myself thinking about past events I become happy, but that other 1% really comes around to bite me in the butt at the end of the day. I repeat the ‘What if’s and the ‘Why me’s way too often for my own good as many others do too. It’s normal. However, he or she who you have a bottled up hate towards may not even be aware of the fact that they did something to change your whole life. While keeping all of what I have previously stated I still CANNOT and WILL NOT let myself move on from the past. Nearly two years have slipped through my fingers since the first time I experienced the oh so real and physically painful feel of heart break. Yet here I am still finding myself discombobulated over the fact that one single human being and how his/her actions can affect me so deeply. When Sheryl Crow said the first cut is the deepest she was not kidding. Love is pain and forgiveness is almost an unreachable level. Loving someone so much that it makes your whole heart hurt is beautiful but if love is pain, I don’t want to live my life in pain. Therefore, I will not get married. Just kidding. Out of all that I’ve just typed and thought out I guess what I am trying to say is that forgiveness comes with time. If you choose to forgive whoever it is that has hurt or dissapointed you, be patient and of good faith and healing will come. If you choose to simply hate this said person, you will remain the only one hurting. Maybe I should take my own advise…